Walking along the new year that has just come, it feels like I am not having enough progression. I am craving for more motivation and some things to happen in the way that they are supposed to. The way that every step takes off for everyone. Having a lot of troubles on the way does make you become stronger but at one point, it does also get annoying to the limit that it makes tired. I am not tired yet and I believe that God is not going to take me to the give up path. If not the give up path, I hope it is also not the worse path but the right one. Perfect one. The perfect road where I am supposed to walk or run or whatever. The right one even if it is pausing for however long. At the moment, I am sitting at a side, with no signs that could lead me to the next turn. The helplines are barred, or I would rather say the signs that should instruct me are so blurred that I can't even see. My eyes and mind are still waiting for it but I know that a little more energy is needed to stand up and move so that I am not missing any directions on my path. Afterall, I could only see a certain degree and the dust that is swimming on the way is distracting and blinding me. All I need at this point is for some energy and motivation that could lift me up from where I am and take me beyond the blinding dust, which I hope is only a few feet and not as long as until the destination. I have walked and walked and walked for a long time for what it feels like half of my life and there was of course a lot of storms, stones and thorns but equally a lot of beautiful things. Things that have taken me to where I am right now. Where I am sitting right now.
I am still sitting here and gladly consciously with a destination waiting for me, which is fixed and I am still here waiting for a rescue.