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Sunday, 1 January 2017

Happy New Year 2017!

With a positive note, WELCOME 2017!

2016 was a mix bag for me and I guess the same for most parts of the world. There had been some good stuff happened among the struggles, that included some important life events too. Anyway, this is wishing you all a blessed and fulfilling year ahead. 
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2017 !! I hope this year is full of positivity and blessings. :) 

So this has made the first post of this year :)

Lots of love.
xxx

ps. image from google. 

Monday, 28 November 2016

Broken boiler..

- I don't know if this warranted a post. Gonna be merely a rant. So please read at your own risk. 

Spent a day waiting for the boiler to be fixed including falling asleep under the quilt where I stayed most of the time trying to keep myself warm from the 12 degrees temp flat. The Letting agency did not bother to let me know until I called them a few mins before they close to find that the flat management sorted the issue and I was shivering for 8 hours without realising that. Obviously, I stupidly thought to turn it off until it was fixed and was waiting for the engineer to come around. Didn't know they could fix it from outside and the letting agency wouldn't bother telling me that it was fixed.  When I found out the news, I really was like a little kid in a sweet shop. All smily and singing :) .

The most ridiculous part was though going and buying an electric heater. Luckily I didn't use it as I bought it just in case this doesn't get fixed, I needed something for the night. Another trip to Argos to return the heater tomorrow. 

Had a very unproductive day because of all this. 
And this is what a cold flat with no heating and no hot water in winter would do to you. A whole day wasted. 

Have a good week ahead all.

Thursday, 24 November 2016

So called friends...

I am beginning to understand why you lose friends as you grow up and in fact, find those true ones that stay in your life. Although they say friendship has no expectations, I think that any kind of relationship should have basic expectations and these should be understood both ways. That's what keeps a bond strong. Making each other happy and being satisfied of making the other happy :)

The world is small. I have realised that in many occasions and you don't know when you'll bump into someone that you haven't had a slightest though of meeting again and you never know when things will change by 180 degrees. The point is, be kind to everyone. If you absolutely don't like someone, then stay away and be quiet. Give them your silence as an answer. Getting into argument will sometimes help you to get everything off the chest and feel better but you don't know when you gonna have to come across a situation where you can't avoid meeting this person and then it's all embarrassing. For you and them.

I did get into argument with a friend sometime ago because I saw things black and white. This friend who was close to me since school days got married. I was so happy for her because she did go through quite a bit in her life and we always tried our best to keep her happy (it's a different matter whether she had even a faintest idea that we did). She moved on, made new friends and we still kept in touch through whatsapp etc.

Several months passed and I suddenly noticed a photo of her with a baby bump. What a surprise. Yes she was halfway through pregnancy. I was sooooo happy. But like I said, I saw things black and white and straight away asked why she didn't bother to share with me and so on. She came up with this reason related to her being unwell almost 5 months before and although I was talking to her throughout that time, apparently I didn't follow up after. It went into an argument. Eventually, I said lets forget it. We are friends. Best friends.. 

I do regret it all now. I wish I didn't ask her. I wish I didn't go back and say 'hey why are we arguing, we are friends'. When someone shows you they don't care, don't disturb them. It's worthless. For some (like me) friendship may be an important word, but some have no idea what it means.Don't waste time on them. Yes, have no expectations but there should be a base for a relationship. Let them be. I am going to let her be. She didn't initially care and I pushed her to accept that we were (once) friends without realising I was pressing too hard on something that was 'past' for her. 

It hurts when you get to realise these things, but hey.. life has to move on.


Tuesday, 14 June 2016

Female feticide and Sex ratio in India - BMJ

While leafing through the BMJ magazine; June, a letter on one of the articles of sBMJ May urged me to find the May issue and read it. It was about the unwelcome sex in India. I have heard about the high occurrence of female feticide in India but happening to hear a lot in the recent days on magazines and blogs.

The article touched on the dangerous traditions in India which favour for the birth of a boy than girl as boys are cheaper because of the dowry system. The high social and economic value of men is the causation for sex selective abortions in India. Though the dowry payments are illegal, it is accepted as a tradition to continue their family hierarchy and this phenomena is deeply rooted in the societies. Although is illegal to do a prenatal examinations to identify the sex of a fetus is illegal in India, if the families once known it is a girl, the fetus is terminated. According to the article, evidently there were about 5 million female fetuses are aborted every year purely on the basis of the sex of the fetus. (190)

There were signs used to be displayed in the diagnostic centres in the '80s & '90s and rarely now quoting "Invest 500 now, and save 50,000 later" which simply means save your money that you have to pay as dowry in the future by identifying the sex now. This is really shocking! Where have the benevolence of humans gone? Do you decide whether you want to be born or not. How can you then take the rights of determining whether a fetus should be born or not. At the end of the day, it has to be a girl, who gives the birth regardless of the fact whether it is a boy or girl child.

There is also a low female to male sex ratio resulted from the sex selective abortions in India. High proportion of marriages are still arranged by parents, and the inability to pay enough dowry to an educated and settled groom by the middle and lower class families is also a huge cause for this. "The government of India indicated that there are about 6000 murders and suicides each year associated with problems of dowry". The laws set out against these feticides are simply worthless because the tradition, as mentioned above, is very deeply rooted in the society.
There are several aspects which are widely held by the people that men are dominant even in funerals where only boys are allowed to do the funeral rites as they believe it helps them to go to heaven after death. Because of the low female to male sex ratio, men may find it difficult to find their right partners so that they might start paying dowry -in the future. A prediction by some.

The article also emphasised that the Indian govt should find the loopholes which allow these abortions against the law and also more freedom, education and awareness programmes are necessary. I strongly believe that education on this issue is fundamental to raise the awareness and the risks caused by; female feticide such as; bleeding, infections, mental problems, uterine injuries and even death.

Ref: Dahal KB, Tripathi S. The unwelcome sex. Student BMJ May 2008; 16: 190-1.

Saturday, 30 April 2016

Apollo Banana Leaf Review

Second bad experience at the Apollo Banala Leaf, Tooting. You can see the link at the end of this post about the previous review following a poor service. This time, (a few months ago) we went there after booking a table for 6.

When we arrived at the restaurant, there was only a couple eating. We had ordered the starters and the drinks. Usually, when we go to restaurant as a family, we first have the starters and order the food only after /nearly finishing with the starters (I am sure a lot of people do the same). It wasn't even 10 minutes of ordering the food, when the phone rang and the staff was taking a booking for a table of 7-10 or something. He immediately came to us and said; 'I have 10 white people coming to eat soon, you need to order your main now. Because when they're here, I won't be able to service you properly'. Note, by this time we didn't even get our starters or drinks to the table and it had only been 10 mins in the restaurant. We were also a group of customers who booked table in advance. Plus if you have a restaurant with a certain amount of capacity, then you must be able to serve all table equally. Doesn't matter white/pink/brown/black/purple!! If you can't, simply don't take the bookings. If a restaurant cannot serve 16 people at a time, you should probably close down or get more staff. Or more conveniently, put a sign outside 'We only serve certain colours'. No offence to any race here. If you go to an English restaurant, you're well treated there than an Asian restaurant. What an irony. There is  no need to rush other customers away when you don't even have a nearly full restaurant at the time. 

We were very disappointed by this and decided to leave the restaurant straight away. Family was being polite and said we had to go but I actually explained to the staff that this was not the right attitude. They are not very welcoming towards Asian people for whatever reason. Extremely disappointed. Please do not go there if you are an Asian and want to be treated decently.

We will never ever go there again.

Previous review:

Friday, 1 January 2016

Happy New Year 2016

Wishing you all a very happy and prosperous New Year 2016! 

Hope this year brings a lot of happiness and peace to every home in this world.
May this 2016 year be good to all.
Lots of love.

Picture taken from google.

Sunday, 27 December 2015

Merry Christmas

Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas!! 

I hope you all had a great Xmas. May this festival bring a lot of joy and peace to this world.


Thursday, 24 December 2015

Thank you to a kind stranger

Some one walking past my house knocked on my door to let me know my car headlights were still on. It had been on for four hours and this person had the kindness to leave his luggage that he was dragging to the side, take his earphones out and knock on my door. Some of you may think this is not much at all, but I think, in a world we are living like this, this is a lot. Thinking about it, if my car battery dies in the next few hours (happened before) and it's Christmas tomorrow, then the weekend, boxing day and so on, I don't know if I could have got RAC to come and re-charge it for me. I don't know how I would have gone to work tomorrow. (Yes, I am working on Christmas day, 4th consecutive Xmas that I am working. NHS you see.).

Anyway, coming back to the point, I wish that this person who was kind to me, has more kindness and happiness from others and that his new year will be a good one. 

Be good and kind to others and you don't have to work hard to earn your own happiness.

Sunday, 29 November 2015

The World is breaking up into pieces - Krishna Nee Begane Baro

Such powerful and beautiful words. When I heard this today, I just felt this was the most needed words at the right time. I wish this world is a much more peaceful place. Everyone is  a human. That's all it is. And some people completely fail to understand this, which is really really sad. 

"Everybody is fighting with their brothers, everybody wants control, don't hesitate to kill one another........ and Religion is the reason the world is breaking into pieces"

"They need a teacher and you're the only one..."





Friday, 27 November 2015

Innocence

Life continues to teach us so many things and I continue to learn.

I wonder how much someone's innocence can be perceived as naivety. There are times when someone puts him/herself forward to help out but ends up being used as an extra pair of hands for something that only needs one hand. Not valued for who they are. Quite sad really. It's like a  poor child being given  the most childish explanation if something couldn't be afforded by the parents so, making up a lie  to not hurt them...and when the child grows up to an adult and reviews things in the memory and realises the painful truth behind the lies or the alternative temporary happiness that was given instead. 

At times even these people are awake to the fact that they are being undermined, it is the true innocence that pushes them to still choose the (painful)way it leads to.  And still be nice. Innocence, is it a good thing or a bad thing? Regardless, the unconditional trust that an innocent puts towards the others is what eventually breaks their heart. Many times, life presents us circumstances where our character and patience are tested. I am sure, at these times, if you be honest and do what you would as your own self (rather than having conversations in your head as to what others would have done in the same circumstance), things would be much more easier. Being innocent is somewhat like this. Or being naive.

Obviously, it depends on which end of the spectrum you're in that determines the goods and bad of being one. In this tough world (this 'tough' perception may be subjective), it is not something that you can survive with forever, I think. Depending on where you are, you will gradually get moulded into the coping strategies or attitude to survive. And, when that happens, going back to the memories when you were taken for granted without you even realising it, is pretty painful. It would hit you like you were a victim of a crime. 

I guess it's part of the journey called life, experiencing the differences, polishing your character constantly and growing up as you move along. At the end of the day, you are you. That's what makes you stronger.  As they say, a metal starts to shine as it is hammered with fire. It undergoes so much pain but becomes a beautiful creation as an end result.  Being innocent is peaceful, but with so much hammering and fire and pain, one may eventually become a beautiful soul. Well, then I wish that being innocent is that's all it is. Easily said. Learning and growing. There are times in life when we come to a pause, not knowing what to do next. One of the best things that humans are blessed with is forgetfulness, so forget and move on. There are things and people that must be ignored and those must not be. 

To you who are reading this, may you be blessed with only good things for being who you are.